The loss of our baby...

Prescious Baby

I found out I was Pregnant about 6 weeks after our wedding

I was told that I was 4 weeks along.

We were so happy and told everyone.

I was never sick just very tired and sore

I was not late yet, I just felt different.

I got to enjoy being pregnant for 2 weeks because at 6 weeks I went to the ER because I wasnt feeling well. I was told that I was miscarrying.

my husband and I were devastated.

I felt like my body failed me.

It was my job to protect my child and I didnt.

I didnt want to be around or talk to anyone

but I put on my brave face.

I never got to hear our babys heartbeat..and that breaks my heart.

I found this poem and It helped me a lot.

What Makes a Mother

I thought of you and closed my eyes

And prayed to God today

I asked "What makes a Mother?"

And I know I heard Him say.

"A Mother has a baby"

This we know is true

"But God can you be a Mother,

When your baby's not with you?"

"Yes, you can," He replied

With confidence in His voice "

I give many babies,

When they leave is not their choice.

Some I send for a lifetime,

And others for the day.

And some I send to feel your womb,

But there's no need to stay." "

I just don't understand this God I want my baby to be here." He took a deep

and cleared His throat
, And then I saw the tear.

"I wish I could show you,

What your child is doing today.

If you could see your child's smile,

With all the other children and say...

'We go to Earth to learn our lessons,

Of love and life and fear.

My mommy loved me oh so much,

I got to come strait here.

I feel so lucky to have a Mom,

Who had so much love for me.

I learned my lessons very quickly,

My Mommy set me free.

I miss my Mommy oh so much,

But I visit her every day.

When she goes to sleep,

On her pillow's where I lay

I stroke her hair and kiss her cheek,

And whisper in her ear.

Mommy don't be sad today,

I'm your baby and I'm here.'

"So you see my dear sweet ones,

your children are okay.

Your babies are born here in My home,

And this is where they'll stay.

They'll wait for you with Me,

Until your lesson's through.

And on the day that you come home

they'll be at the gates for you.

So now you see what makes a Mother,

It's the feeling in your heart

it's the love you had so much of Right from the very start

Though some on earth may not realize,

you are a Mother.

Until their time is done.

They'll be up here with Me one day and know that you are the best one!"

my husband and I are TTC at the moment..

Without Hope you have nothing

Brenda <3

Our Fur Babies!!

Coby & Bella

Coby and Bella wow!! I love those two

those are my babies for now.

My Dear Husband and I couldnt compromise on what breed of dog we would get..

I wanted a German Shephard and Bren wanted a Boxer...

He said that we could only have 1 dog.. all along I knew I was going to get my way and have 2 dogs.. whaaaa laaaa!!! I won..

I got Coby when he was 6 weeks old (I had to basically beg my husband to let me buy him)

I got him a week before our wedding for $100.00 I know what a Sale!!

at first I wanted to name him Charlie or Rex but nooooopeeeee!!! Bren had to win and we named him Coby

Bella Was free! One of Brens best friends gave her to us.

she is the sweetest most prescious girl...

I cant believe how protective Coby is of her.

when we first got Bella, Coby was 4 months and he would not go near her.. He probably thought she was a rat or something lol

Now they share a dog house

We dont know why, they have two houses in the back yard but

share one house. I think they like to cuddle together.

I LOVE MY FUR BABIES!!!!

Brenda <3

The Best Day of our Lifes so far....

Our Wedding Day..

May 2, 2009

was our Wedding day (by this time we have been dating for 5 1/2 years)

after a whole year of planning the day was finally here.

We were both very excited

and It felt great that most of our family drove hours to be with us on this special day

His ring wouldnt fit...at first

He had not seen me since the night before...

(I did call him every hour to make sure he wasnt going to run haha!!)

He was VERY nervous

It was storming the day before and we were terrified because we were having an outside ceremony.. and of course I didnt have a backup plan...

but It had cleared up by the morning of the wedding.

THANK GOD



Omar, Me, Rocio- my siblings


there were 5 girls and 5 guys in the wedding party



GIRLS

Nancy, Vanessa and Maribel - Friends of mine since first grade in elementary school

Rocio- Maid of Honor and my sister

Jori- my husbands cousin



GUYS

Matt, Jeff, Mike, Marc- Friends of my husband since he was 10 years old ( I think! lol)

Omar - My Brother



Ring Bearer

Zachary

My husbands lil cousin




Jori, Nancy, Rocio, Me, Vanessa, Maribel

My famous parents. yes the strict ones!!

It was absolutely Beautiful

Brenda <3

A little bit more info on us.....

Our Heritage..

I am Hispanic/ Mexican whatever

my parents were both born in Guadalajara, Mexico

I speak, read, write spanish

(shh!! thats how I got my job)

I LOVE that I am Mexican and so does my husband

I was raised by very traditional strict parents

(yup!! I got the belt or the chancla all the time well sometimes they threw shoes, fruits, brushes, phones, spoons/ forks at me...

I still had a curfew at the age of 20 (crazy I know)

but my husband respected that.

I had to be home at 11:00pm on weekdays and at 12:00pm on weekends

and for the first 2 years that we dated I was NOT allowed to ride with him in his truck

he was never allowed in my room where we could be alone.

I hated it at the time but now

I am grateful

because who knows how I would of turned out if they werent strict lol

I am a feisty Mexican

My Husband Is Italian/ White

his parents were both born in California and

his Grandprents (known as Nonni & Nonno) were born in Italy

His family is also very traditional and strict

for that reason my husband is were respectful and has great manners

unless someone makes him mad...

he is a very feisty Italian

and I believe that when we have kids they will be some

very feisty Mexitalians.. wow!!!

Brenda <3

My Dear Husband & I

My Dear Husband & I

Bren and I met in our freshman year of High School in 2001

after being just friends for a couple of years he finally had the courage (yes believe it our not I intimidated that big guy) to ask me out on Septeber 16, 2003

of course I said "yes"

(and I am sooo glad that I did)

on September 16, 2003 (yup!! on our 3 year anniversary of dating) he asked me to

yes... Be his wife..

and again of course I said "Yes"

I was super excited and of course showing of my beautiful engagement ring..

That was it " I was going to marry my Best Friend"

we decided to wait a couple of years to get married...

Brenda <3